Week 3 - Report & Table

The assassination of Kennedy. Live Aid. Events that perhaps would not be fully appreciated until the passage of time revealed their true significance. In twenty years will you remember where you were when Neil Cameron debuted for the Racks Pack? Twenty minutes?

Rejoice fellow sports fans - once again we have the pleasure of a Captains report from Mr Keith Walls.

Captains Report

When in off is in off!

"After being the only loser in the first week the captain had to sort his game out. He had been playing worse than a 3-string guitar. The 'bye' week off allowed him some practice with Neil 'the newcomer' and he had his sights set on a surprise appearance at the Berkshire open last Sunday.
It sounded like the perfect way to get back that competitive edge that had suddenly upped sticks, took the last of the housekeeping money and moved to open a cantina in Mexico. Looking to his team mates for help I asked Brad about the competition , "was it tough?" "am I out of my depth?" "would it be good for me just to go and spend the day at the tables?" After him telling me for the fifth time not to bother I decided to seek a second opinion so I texted Andy Brant from the my Thursday night Irish Club team.

"Andy, what time does the Berkshire Open start tomorrow - I was thinking of entering"

Two minutes later and the beeping of the second opinion arrived : (this is exactly as it read)

"Aint got a clue m8, prob wont start till bout 12 I wod of fort but don't waste ur money m8, u R poo"

Terrific.

So the cue went back into the cupboard and only saw daylight Monday night as we took on the toughest of the teams in our section - the Thatched Cottage.

Brad was awol in London and Lee was still sunning himself abroad so we had the bare six. The thought of the captain playing twice was a devastating blow to the Racks Pack morale but despite this he made the bold move of going first.

Five minutes later and eyeing up his last red it looked like another captaincy masterstroke as long as he avoided the obvious in-off to the middle. Mission accomplished- the captain's deep screw 'arc'd' the white into the top corner for 0-1.

Not to be outdone the team then tried to see who could produce the best in off of the night. JY went on next and it took him almost 13 attempts on the black before he managed to go in off and lose the frame. Eyeing up attempt number 13 on the black, he pulled a 'Babe Ruth' by pointing his cue at the middle pocket (where he thought the white might go). Luckily he was wrong (he missed the black on the way down, clipping it on the way back) but made amends later in the frame by sinking the white dead-weight in the middle for 0-2.

Kev got us off the mark (The captain will leave Kev to describe his frames) for 1-2.

Swanny lost for 1-3 and then Neil (who must have been wondering what the hell he had let himself in for, and was it too late to sign for someone else) hit an 'evil Knieval' jump shot for 1-4.

Tready restored some sanity to proceedings for 2-4 and then went back on straight away to show that he too enjoyed nothing better than giving two shots away. Rather than settle for an old-fashioned in off like the rest of us, he preferred the four ball plant that knocked his opponents red in from 3 feet. 2-5

The captain then defied the odds by actually winning one and potting a long black that used to be routine when he could play. Considering that you wouldn't trust him to put a space hopper into a skip, no one fancied him on the black, least of all himself- but somehow he got it. 3-5

JY made it 4-5 and we were almost back in it. But a loss from the Slugger was followed by yet another in off the black from Swanny. It was the absolute banker - a dead cert, stick on, empty the wheelbarrow, mortgage job in-off, and Swanny duly sent the punters home happy as he nailed it ! 4-7, and it was left to Neil 'the newcomer' to win the last for a 5-7 defeat.

To cap a great night for the captain, him and Neil went back to Racks for another beer and some more pool only to find that he still owed Racks five pounds from the earlier bar bill that he forgot to pay.

Next week our first home game of the season. They will be dancing in the streets of Maidenhead because the Captain is off for some high altitude training in Northern Ireland. He therefore passes on the baton of budge to the SluggerÂ…

THE CAPTAINS 'POINTLESS FLAIR' SHOT OF THE WEEK :
This week theawardd goes to Neil, who capped a decent debut by doubling the black to win his first career frame in the last frame of the night. Has anyone ever looked so downhearted after winning their first ever frame?"

Nice one Keith. My own games were, of course, a master-class in mediocrity. The first was solid enough, if perhaps uninspring. I only played one bad shot in the second frame (ironically potting a ball when trying to cover the pocket) but it cost me the game and the rest is history.

I am looking forward to taking over the reigns if only temporarily. A good result next week against the bottom team of the division should put us on course to qualify for the 'champions league'.

Week 3 RESULTS
24-Jul-06

Farmers B 5 Bell B 7
Thatch B 7 Racks Pack 5
WAMSDAD A [bye]

TABLE
Team (played) points

Thatch B (2) 23
Racks Pack (2) 19
Farmers Boy (3) 19
Bell B (3) 17
WAMSDAD A (2) 10