Hoping For A Miracle.
I’m a total TV sports addict (apart from cricket!). I watch so much of the stuff is ridiculous, but when you are watching something live it’s always more fun, especially when you see some sort of cliffhanger or one-off miracle happening that will live long in the memory. My work mates’ brother went to the Liverpool - Milan Champions League final in Turkey a few years back, and left at half-time when Liverpool were 3-0 down. He and his friends were totally fed up and couldn’t face the taxi queue to get back into Istanbul centre once the match had finished. After a 30 minute cab ride into town they saw Liverpool fans running out of nearby bars screaming and shouting and the horror of what they had done dawned on them - Liverpool were back to 3-3! It was heading for extra time and the drama of what would follow, with a penalty shoot-out to decide the greatest prize in European club football, will go down in football folklore. Meanwhile, they sat in a bar watching it unfold not knowing whether to laugh or cry.
Of course watching a sporting miracle is one thing, but actually being part of that ‘miracle’ is something special, a story to tell the grandkids for years and years to come. As we arrived at Racks on Monday the question on the back pages of every sports publication in the country was “Could the Rackspack sink the Thatched Cottage 11-1, clinch the section title and create their own sporting miracle?”
We had been greeted by the news that regardless of the result we had drawn the Thatched anyway in the quarters. The only thing left to sort out was the section winner and therefore have home advantage for the knock out stages starting next Monday. Team news showed that The Slugger was away scouting burlesque houses in Paris, France but Grinder Greenwood had returned to take his place and give us the six we needed.
Having to win any pool match 11-1 is not an enviable position, but of course it was our own fault we were in this position the first place - the balls-up with the Golden Cross game had seen to that. However with Christmas rapidly approaching we were heading for that season of miracles so you never know. James “Britain's Hardest” Harness had gone from breaking two vertebrae in his back and fracturing his pelvis on the Saturday, to turning up at the Lady Haig to watch his pool team on the Thursday! Yep, these were certainly strange times and strange things were a-happening. If ever there was time for a miracle it was now.
The Miracle of the Pointless Flair Shot of the Week
We didn’t have to wait long to see it this week. Frame one, and in the battle of the two Johns, John ‘the Coach’ Shiel did his level best to screw up his frame but got let off when John ‘the Landlord’ Molley rattled a long black. It looked safe enough in the middle of the bottom cushion and the white up in the baulk end. But a length of the table double slammed into the top corner put the Racks one up. The scoreboard was up and running and with The Bear up next, the impossible was possible.
The Three Blind Men
One frame up was as close as we got, and it was downhill from here. The Bear went for a finish against Vinny, missed the double on the black and left Vinny to clear up. 1-1
Neil ‘the magic’ got beat by an inspired Farrah (2-1) and JY lost to Dog who had his own miracle when somehow escaping from a snooker and covering JYs only yellow in the process. 3-1
‘Wonder’ took Uzzell out with some ease to get us back in the game (3-2) but the comeback was short-lived as Lee lost to Lol. Lol had three easy reds left all over pockets and the black on its spot. Lee decided the finish wasn’t easy enough so after hitting his last yellow in a wild double attempt he managed to pot two of the three reds and give Lol two visits to finish if off. 4-2 down at the break and by now even a 8-4 win would not be enough, so it was just a case of damage limitation.
The Miracle of the Five Loaves and Two Fishes.
We all know how Jesus fed the crowds near Galilee with just five loaves and two fish. That’s nothing. Every week at Racks Amy somehow manages to feed two pool teams with only six slices of bread, two slices of ham and a tin of tuna - all for only six quid! If there’s ever a second coming then let’s hope the Lord doesn’t decide to start the faith in Maidenhead high street.
The Miracle of the Amazing Vanishing Man.
Despite JYs protests that he wanted to play early in the back six, Coach decided to put the big guns out first to try and get us back into the game and lay down a marker for next weeks knockout. The Wonder doubled up on the night with victory over Vinny, and in an amusing literary twist ‘The Bear’ got one over Steve ‘Grizzly’ Adams. 4-4
With the match all square it was time for us to open our legs and show our class. Unfortunately the quickest finish we could manage in the remaining four frames was by JY, who couldn’t be bothered hanging around for his frame and instead grabbed his cue and legged it. The ‘Cinderella Man’ struck again as he raced off home rather than hang about and turn into a pumpkin by half ten. It was a new and interesting variation on JY’s usual disappearing act.
I’m a total TV sports addict (apart from cricket!). I watch so much of the stuff is ridiculous, but when you are watching something live it’s always more fun, especially when you see some sort of cliffhanger or one-off miracle happening that will live long in the memory. My work mates’ brother went to the Liverpool - Milan Champions League final in Turkey a few years back, and left at half-time when Liverpool were 3-0 down. He and his friends were totally fed up and couldn’t face the taxi queue to get back into Istanbul centre once the match had finished. After a 30 minute cab ride into town they saw Liverpool fans running out of nearby bars screaming and shouting and the horror of what they had done dawned on them - Liverpool were back to 3-3! It was heading for extra time and the drama of what would follow, with a penalty shoot-out to decide the greatest prize in European club football, will go down in football folklore. Meanwhile, they sat in a bar watching it unfold not knowing whether to laugh or cry.
Of course watching a sporting miracle is one thing, but actually being part of that ‘miracle’ is something special, a story to tell the grandkids for years and years to come. As we arrived at Racks on Monday the question on the back pages of every sports publication in the country was “Could the Rackspack sink the Thatched Cottage 11-1, clinch the section title and create their own sporting miracle?”
We had been greeted by the news that regardless of the result we had drawn the Thatched anyway in the quarters. The only thing left to sort out was the section winner and therefore have home advantage for the knock out stages starting next Monday. Team news showed that The Slugger was away scouting burlesque houses in Paris, France but Grinder Greenwood had returned to take his place and give us the six we needed.
Having to win any pool match 11-1 is not an enviable position, but of course it was our own fault we were in this position the first place - the balls-up with the Golden Cross game had seen to that. However with Christmas rapidly approaching we were heading for that season of miracles so you never know. James “Britain's Hardest” Harness had gone from breaking two vertebrae in his back and fracturing his pelvis on the Saturday, to turning up at the Lady Haig to watch his pool team on the Thursday! Yep, these were certainly strange times and strange things were a-happening. If ever there was time for a miracle it was now.
The Miracle of the Pointless Flair Shot of the Week
We didn’t have to wait long to see it this week. Frame one, and in the battle of the two Johns, John ‘the Coach’ Shiel did his level best to screw up his frame but got let off when John ‘the Landlord’ Molley rattled a long black. It looked safe enough in the middle of the bottom cushion and the white up in the baulk end. But a length of the table double slammed into the top corner put the Racks one up. The scoreboard was up and running and with The Bear up next, the impossible was possible.
The Three Blind Men
One frame up was as close as we got, and it was downhill from here. The Bear went for a finish against Vinny, missed the double on the black and left Vinny to clear up. 1-1
Neil ‘the magic’ got beat by an inspired Farrah (2-1) and JY lost to Dog who had his own miracle when somehow escaping from a snooker and covering JYs only yellow in the process. 3-1
‘Wonder’ took Uzzell out with some ease to get us back in the game (3-2) but the comeback was short-lived as Lee lost to Lol. Lol had three easy reds left all over pockets and the black on its spot. Lee decided the finish wasn’t easy enough so after hitting his last yellow in a wild double attempt he managed to pot two of the three reds and give Lol two visits to finish if off. 4-2 down at the break and by now even a 8-4 win would not be enough, so it was just a case of damage limitation.
The Miracle of the Five Loaves and Two Fishes.
We all know how Jesus fed the crowds near Galilee with just five loaves and two fish. That’s nothing. Every week at Racks Amy somehow manages to feed two pool teams with only six slices of bread, two slices of ham and a tin of tuna - all for only six quid! If there’s ever a second coming then let’s hope the Lord doesn’t decide to start the faith in Maidenhead high street.
The Miracle of the Amazing Vanishing Man.
Despite JYs protests that he wanted to play early in the back six, Coach decided to put the big guns out first to try and get us back into the game and lay down a marker for next weeks knockout. The Wonder doubled up on the night with victory over Vinny, and in an amusing literary twist ‘The Bear’ got one over Steve ‘Grizzly’ Adams. 4-4
With the match all square it was time for us to open our legs and show our class. Unfortunately the quickest finish we could manage in the remaining four frames was by JY, who couldn’t be bothered hanging around for his frame and instead grabbed his cue and legged it. The ‘Cinderella Man’ struck again as he raced off home rather than hang about and turn into a pumpkin by half ten. It was a new and interesting variation on JY’s usual disappearing act.
While most of us were either laughing or just plain dumbstruck Coach was trying to hand Uzzell a double doughnut. Maybe the disappearance of JY to blame, or maybe just the terrible shot selection (or both) but either way Rob sent Coach packing and it was 5-4. Lol was the grateful recipient of JY’s Houdini impression and we went from 4-4 to 6-4 down in a matter of minutes.
Magic played an excellent solid frame against Dog to give us hope of the draw (6-5) but Chris Farrah struck again for his double against Lee to put us down for good. 7-5 after Lee gave away a deliberate foul only to see Chris pull out a fantastic finish for a Man of the Match performance and victory for the thatched boys.
So we taste defeat for the first time in the campaign in unusual circumstances. It’s been a bizarre few seasons. Over the years we have played and won matches having only four players, struggled at times to get even 6, and not turned up for a match by misreading the fixtures. But I don’t recall us starting with a full team and ending up giving away a frame, so we have once again broken new ground.
In the ultimate piss-take JY text late on to say he had left his coat there and could we find it for him. No doubt he was relieved we found it, which is ironic as we only placed it behind the bar after we all relieved ourselves on it.
Next Monday is the quarter finals and the draw couldn’t be tougher. If we beat the Thatched then it looks like Bracknell in the semi (if they win as expected against the Pond House). Meanwhile in the other half, Thatched A, Forresters, Woodlands Park and the other Racks side will do battle for the honour of taking home a large portion Racks Pack whoop-ass in the final.
This is our third year and our third quarter-final, surely it wont go like the last two and end up in a 7-6 defeat for the mighty Racks boys? Not three times in a row!?! What sort of horrible miracle would that be?
Magic played an excellent solid frame against Dog to give us hope of the draw (6-5) but Chris Farrah struck again for his double against Lee to put us down for good. 7-5 after Lee gave away a deliberate foul only to see Chris pull out a fantastic finish for a Man of the Match performance and victory for the thatched boys.
So we taste defeat for the first time in the campaign in unusual circumstances. It’s been a bizarre few seasons. Over the years we have played and won matches having only four players, struggled at times to get even 6, and not turned up for a match by misreading the fixtures. But I don’t recall us starting with a full team and ending up giving away a frame, so we have once again broken new ground.
In the ultimate piss-take JY text late on to say he had left his coat there and could we find it for him. No doubt he was relieved we found it, which is ironic as we only placed it behind the bar after we all relieved ourselves on it.
Next Monday is the quarter finals and the draw couldn’t be tougher. If we beat the Thatched then it looks like Bracknell in the semi (if they win as expected against the Pond House). Meanwhile in the other half, Thatched A, Forresters, Woodlands Park and the other Racks side will do battle for the honour of taking home a large portion Racks Pack whoop-ass in the final.
This is our third year and our third quarter-final, surely it wont go like the last two and end up in a 7-6 defeat for the mighty Racks boys? Not three times in a row!?! What sort of horrible miracle would that be?
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